Final Preparations and the Great Missing Vlog

Last night I had a strange moment.  It was 8:00 pm, the windows were open to the hot Seattle night, and I stood alone in my apartment.  I was wondering, as usual, what it was that I had to do next.  And then it hit me: my preparations were done.

Everything is organized.  Everything is packed.  Everything is bought.  I’m ready.

I had a glass of wine.

Today was spent socializing.  I had a “Bon voyage” brunch with a good friend, and I’ll be having a “Bon voyage” dinner tonight with more.  Tomorrow I roll up my sleeves and clean my apartment for the renters.  The day after that, I hit the road.

Of course I’m not “ready.”  There are many things I wish I’d done that I haven’t, like study Spanish harder, or make an effort to stay in shape after I canceled my gym membership, or hire a mechanic to give me a tutorial on my Miata under the hood.  Ah, I had grand ambitions!  Those castaways will likely haunt me on the road, and I’m sure I’ll have a chance to regret them.  But I only had so much time.

However, there’s one missing item that causes me the most grief, and the sharp-of-eye can spot it in the right-most column of my list.  I haven’t prepared for my vlog.

(The sharp-of-eye might also spot the middle column on my list, called “Book Etc.” This relates to another project of mine: trying to market a novel I’ve written.  More on that in later posts).

From the very beginning of this dream, I’ve wanted to vlog it: to make an ongoing video travelogue with regular posts on YouTube.  I bought equipment for it: cameras, tripods, microphones, video editing software.  I set up a YouTube channel.  I even bought a drone!  And yes, it’s true, I can still do it.  The trip hasn’t started yet.

But I was supposed to be practicing the art.  And I haven’t been.

Of all the failures, this one bothers me the most.  Because it comes from being camera-shy.  The fact is, I hate turning a camera on myself.  I get terribly nervous.  So I didn’t just “lack the time” to practice vlogging, I actively shunned it and procrastinated on it.  And now a long-standing dream and a significant investment may come to nothing.

As of this writing I don’t know whether I’m going to make that vlog or not.  I still WANT to do it. Obviously, to start now means I’d have to learn as I go, practice on the road itself.  My first videos would be awfully clunky.  But will I get over myself enough to make them?

Stay tuned to find out.